Mommy Can We Keep The Cat?

As the Late News media enters its last decade, let us return to yesteryear...

  

It is 1957 and an article appears in the Long Island Press about a cat caught in a tree.  Seems then 7 year old Dennis LaVista saw a cat in the tree, in front of his Garden Apartment on 77th Avenue in Kew Garden Hills, Queens.  Dennis had seen this cat before.  It hung around his block but he noticed something else.  It wasn't moving.  Dennis watched it for awhile and then ran and told his Mommy.

Mommy came outside and they both watched the cat.  The cat didn't move and they realized the cat was scared, frozen by fear and unable to move.  Mommy then went and dialed the Operator.  This is 1957, so there is no 911, 311 or any other designation for some need for city services.  You called the Operator and the Operator called the proper agency.  In this case, the Fire Department.

Now the Borough of Queens in 1957 is not the Queens of today.  It was a lot more rural.  There were no tall buildings and the Borough still had some farms near it's eastern border.  So the Fire Department didn't have that much to do, so they sent out a Truck with a ladder and the Firemen got the frightened cat out of the tree.  The Long Island Press didn't have that much to do either, so this was all dutifully reported in an article.  And the article ends with 7 year old Dennis LaVista asking.  "Mommy can we keep the cat?"

Well Dennis LaVista goes to P.S. 164 and the next day, when he shows up in school, he's a celebrity.  I guess we could all read back then but no one among all the all kids at P.S. 164 has ever known anyone who has been in the newspaper.  And as a hero, who saved a cat.  So everyone comes over to talk to Dennis about this and Dennis basks in the glow of celebrity.

Dennis also happens to sit next to the future editor of NYUUGGEE, and as we are getting ready to leave that day, Dennis first checks to make sure that there's no one else around but us and then he says.  "I never said that.  I knew we couldn't keep the cat.  I didn't even want to keep the cat."

Now you may be saying what's the BFD?  It's a cute little story on a slow news day and it gives the cute little story, a cute little ending.  But Dennis LaVista and the future editor of NYUUGGEE were  horrified, scarred for life maybe that Dennis was not only misquoted, but that a newspaper would just make up something, that was never said.

So as the Late News Media enters it's final decade, try to remember that Fake News is nothing new.  Fake News did not come about because of DJT 45th and 47th POTUS.  And Fake News did not come about when the Late News Media decided to play, It's All That Guy's Fault, sometime during President Bubba and W's Administrations.  Fake News has always been with us and it will outlast the Late News Media, long after its passing.

Just remember, as we always do, that 7 year old Dennis LaVista never asked.  "Mommy can we keep the cat?"

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Hang Down Your Head

"Hang down your head, Tom Dooley

Hang down your head and cry

Hang down your head, Tom Dooley

Poor boy, you're bound to die"*

Tom Dula pronounced Dooley, was a young man who couldn't help from sleeping with two women or some say three, at the same time.  And all of them were cousins, Laura, Anne and Pauline.  Well one of them Laura, was found stabbed to death.  Most people thought it was a jealous Anne, who stabbed Laura to death.  Anne was arrested and tried but then Tom Dula either because he saw the error of his ways, or he just couldn't stand to see another of his paramours die, confessed.  Tom Dula, said it was me and Anne had nothing to do with it.  Of course Anne, was then acquitted.

Now Tom Dula may have had some bumps in the road.  He was on the losing side in the Civil War and romantically he may have loved too often and too well, if not too wisely.  But he was, in the end, an honorable man.  He faced up to his demons.  Tom Dula was hung but the story of Tom Dula lives on.  It was a ballad by Thomas Land, that was sung through the decades, till someone recorded it in 1938.  The Kingston Trio has the most famous recording.

This ballad is included in 'American Songs of the Century' and is also one of the 'Top 100 of All Time Western Songs'.  It is a haunting and sorrowful ballad, about lost lives and lost love.

All of which brings us to modern day and one Lindsay Clancy.  Lindsay strangled her three children to death, then she slit her wrists and threw herself out the window.  She didn't use as much pressure on her wrists, as she did when she strangled her children and the window she jumped out of, was on the second floor.  So it was only filicide not filicide/suicide.

Of course she was arrested and tried but then a strange thing happened, a hung jury.  The poor woman suffers from depression and hears voices.  So she and her attorneys say.  And the doctors didn't give her the right meds.  And it's also postpartum depression and that's a killer.  The jury saw her in a wheelchair.  Her husband left her and well, she's lost her kids.  11 members of the jury felt sorry for her.  Juries are often ruled by emotion, not the law, or even common sense.

They hung Tom Dolley/Dula both in the song and in real life.  Lindsay Clancy may only be sent to a mental institution and don't be surprised if sometime in the future, she gets out of that wheelchair and with the right meds, she's ready to rejoin society.

Honor is a strange thing.  Some people are born with it and some people acquire it through a test of their will.  Then there are other people, people who you would least expect to have it and yet, they acquire it.  They acquire it, through tragedy, suffering and death.  Sometimes, their own.

They'll be no haunting and sorrowful ballads for Lindsay Clancy.

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*Thomas Land

Quiz Time

Get out your pencils and get ready, it's Quiz Time again.

Question 1.  

Meghan and Harry were in the news because.

A.  They moved to Manhattan where they can get chased by the Paparazzi.

B.  They moved back to Merry Ole England and were welcomed back to Buckingham Palace with open arms.

C.  They moved to Texas, where they will open a BBQ.

D.  They moved back to England, almost in silence.

Question 2.  

Art Garfunkel announced.

A.  He takes long distance walks in the United States, Japan, Europe and he can't find Paul Simon anywhere.

B.  He is collaborating on an album with Jelly Roll.

C. He goes for long distance walks in the United States, Japan, Europe and sometimes he can't remember what country he's in.

D.  He was thinking of leaving the U.S. of A. because of DJT 45th and 47th POTUS.

E.  Who is Art Garfunkel and why is this a question?

Question 3.  

DJT 45th and 47th POTUS  is thinking of giving New Mexico a new name.  The new name will be.

A.  47, as New Mexico is our 47th State and someone is also the 47th POTUS.

B.  Central Park West.

C.  New America

D.  Mara Largo II

Question 4.  Since last week was 9/11 we couldn't let that pass without a question about it.

Osama Bin Laden had his Myrmidons attack the World Trade Center on 9/11 because.

A.  They hate us.

B.  The terrorists wanted a win and the terrorists won.

C.  Osama wanted to get our F-16s out of Mecca

D  Osama and his Myrmidons are terrorists and attacking places especially big buildings, is what they do.

E.  Osama hated Donald John Trump.  Osama thought the New York City Entrepreneur, was just like Hitler.

Answers.

Question 1.  The answer is D.  It's kind of sad if you stop to think about it.  But gone are the days of the tell all books, the Netflix specials, the mad dash around Manhattan chased by the Paparazzi and even the cooking shows.

Question 2.  The answer is D but if you picked E, we'll give it to you.  Art Garfunkel's was the flip side of Simon and Garfunkel, and well, not too many people could pick him out of a crowd of two.

Question 3.  The answer is C.  This one was too easy but we're kind of partial to Central Park West and not just because we thought of it.  It has a certain ring to it.

Question 4.  The answer is C.  This one came right out of the horse's mouth but if you listened to The Late Media, you might have missed this and you might have gone with A or B.  They repeated those two ad nauseum.  So if you picked A or B give yourself 10 points.

Each question is worth 25 points and everyone should have gotten at least an 85 here, as this quiz was an easy one.  We like to give easy ones once in a while.  We want people to feel good about themselves.

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