Sunday, May 3, 2020


Why You Gotta Be So Rude?
There is a neighborhood just down the road and we like to think of it as East Egg because there are Mansions there that look like the Great Gatsby could have lived in them.  Well actually these homes are beyond just Gatsby’s, as Gatsby lived in West Egg.  Daisy lived in East Egg where the real money was.  And, as I wandered through this wonderland of private streets, elaborate gardens and huge Mansions, I saw Landscapers hard at work, mowing lawns, trimming hedges and keeping the Mansions ready for when Daisy and Jay Gatsby come back, hand in hand.

And I realized that these Landscapers, these nameless, unknown men are getting the job done while all around them people jog and stroll.  And, some of these people jogging and strolling aren’t even wearing masks.  And these joggers and strollers are obviously paying no attention to the ‘Stay Home Stay Safe’ Fatwas issued by the City, State and Federal Governments.  Then I realized theses Landscapers, these hardworking men well…  They’re heroes. 

I mean the, Landscapers could get the Chinese, Wuhan Kung Flu as these hardworking men are on the front lines, literally.  And we think it’s time to take a moment and honor these brave men.  So, here’s to the Landscapers, God Bless Them, Heroes All.

And disturbing news had been coming out of North Korea.  Some sources were saying that Kim Jong Un had unsuccessful heart surgery and wound up in a vegetative state.  Other sources were saying he was dead.  Now we’ve made fun of him so many times over the years, that we think of him as a friend.  I mean the guy loves to eat, drink and party into the late, night hours.  Kim Jong Un also loves the NBA and Jackie Chan movies.  What’s not to like there?  And Kim Jong loves one of the guys from the old neighborhood and our friend, Donald John Trump, 45th President of the United States.  And Kim Jong Un had his brother whacked, just like Michael Corleone did.  And King Jong Un loves to set off ballistic missiles like they’re fireworks on the 4th of July, so we would have been real, sorry to hear he was gone.

But good news, as Kim Jung Un popped up alive and well on May 1 which is May Day.  May Day is the biggest day of the year if you’re a commie, so there was no holding him back.  And, it seems that reports of his demise, as Mark Twain put it years ago “were greatly exaggerated”.  Or as we would say today, just more fake news. 

And we’re happy too because while most of the world thinks of Kim Jong Un as this crazy guy who wanted to set off nuclear Armageddon, try to remember that in North Korea or properly put, The Democratic People’s Republic of Korea, he is… a hero.  And this world always needs heroes.

Dicens simile factum est
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