Trouble

"If you're looking for trouble.  You came to the right place.  If you're looking for trouble.  Take a look right at my face." 

So sang Elvis back in 1958 with music and lyrics by Lieber and Stoller.  And, that seems to be the theme song that is breaking out all over the place.  As you can see in the picture above a former College Professor is holding a machete to the neck of a intrepid NY Post Reporter.  What had that Reporter done?  He had asked her about a now viral video where said former Professor had been caught, ranting and raving at some of her former students over the abortion thing.  Lucky for those students the former Professor didn't have her machete with her when she went on that rant.  And, we say former Professor and her former students, as the College she worked for Hunter College, fired her. 

Picking up the baton next is Tom Hanks pictured right above.  As you can see that guy with Tom Hank's finger in his face must have said or did something.  Tom in turn gave him the "if you're looking for trouble, look right at my face", question.  

And, Tom Hanks is the guy who stormed the beaches of Normandy in 'Saving Private Ryan', sunk German submarines in 'Greyhound' and took out the Mob in 'Road To Perdition'.  And Tom Hanks had to be the kind of guy that Lieber and Stoller had in mind, when they warned "don't you mess around with me".

And carrying that baton over the finish line is this guy.  

That's James Holzhauer newly crowned Jeopardy Masters Champion.  If you go up against this guy, you lose.  When he hits the Daily Double he bets all his chips.  Then he gets the question right and the game is over even if it's early in Double Jeopardy or just late in Single Jeopardy.  He just has so much money at that point that you can't catch him.  And, you're left on that stage in the Alex Trebeck studio writhing in agony for the remainder of the show, as the answers click off and even Final Jeopardy can't save you, as he just has too much dough.  Look at that face.  That's Holzhauer going all in.  And, that's the line "because I'm evil.  My middle name is misery."

Here are the lyrics and you can see how it's just breaking out all over.

If you're looking for trouble
You came to the right place
If you're looking for trouble
Take a look right at my face
I was born standing up
And talking back
My daddy was a green-eyed mountain jack
'Cause I'm evil, my middle name is misery
Well, I'm evil, so don't you mess around with me

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Democracy Is Dead

Can we all just agree if for no other purpose that we don't have to read another article on the subject, that democracy is dead.  How many articles have to be written about something being dead, before we can all just agree that it is dead?  This shouldn't be so hard.  Lets say after 1,000 articles about how something is dead, it's dead.  Okay if that's not enough, how about a5,000?  I think we've all passed that point a while ago and if not, at least in the last year or so.  So all together now, democracy is dead!

Of course those of you who are familiar with the Constitution of the United States, know that there never was a democracy and therefore since it never existed it can't really die but why get nit-picky about the matter.  One more time, democracy is dead!

What does this mean?  Can you go to work tomorrow?  School?  The beach, the movies bowling?  Can you log on to your computer?  Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes and of course yes!  According to a lot of the Talking Heads and The Cognoscenti of The Known World, democracy died quite a while ago and you've been doing all these things anyway, so keep it up.  It will help the economy.

When exactly did democracy die?  It could have been the Hayes/Tilden Presidential election of 1876.  Or it could have been the Alien and Sedition Acts of 1798.  Or it could have been the Alien and Sedition Acts of 1917.  Or it could have been the 2000 Presidential election or the 2016 one or the 2020 one.  Or it could have happened after one of the many Supreme Court decisions that were handed down by the Nine Pointy Headed Wonders Of The Known World.  But regardless of where or when, we think that everyone can clearly see and more importantly agree, that democracy is dead.  It's time to move on.

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"The CIA Killed My Uncle"

That quote in the title is not attributed to anyone here but rather RFK Jr. pictured above.  But wait, someone here's uncle wound up in the trunk of his car with two bullet holes in his head.  The authorities labeled it a suicide.  Now the second bullet and him being in the trunk of the car kind of put some doubt on the suicide angle.  But then some people said it was Mob related.  But the uncle was an accountant for the Department of Defense and well he didn't owe money or anything so...  Then someone else here's Grandmother disappeared a few decades ago but she worked for the Department of the Interior not the CIA or the FBI or the NSA or so they said.  She used to travel to Europe, Asia and even Cuba which didn't seem to have anything to do with the Dept. of the Interior.  No body was ever found and some people say it was an Alien abduction.  But getting back to RFK Jr., his uncle was the venerable and assassinated President JFK. 

 

Now, there are more conspiracy theories surrounding who shot JFK, than there were people in Dealey Plaza that day on November 23, 1963 so it's easy for any claim to sort of get lost in the avalanche of conspiracy theories.  But then RFK Jr., is obviously a Kennedy, so when he speaks about this you would think people would listen.  But alas it seems no one has paid much attention to his claim.  Only a handful of places in the Screen-O-Sphere including us, have even mentioned it.  

Now RFK Jr. says there are documents on this lots of documents.  And, RFK Jr. is running for President although no one pays much attention to that either.  Maybe because he went to the Old Brains Biden school of mumbling and not making any sense, when he speaks.  And the dems already have the original, as President.  Who needs another one?  It could also be that while RFK Jr., said their are documents, he didn't have any.

Now these documents might be in the mass of documents that the government has been hoarding for the last sixty years.  But then every couple of decades they have released a whole batch and there is nothing, ever, in them.  Why all these documents are kept secret no one ever says.  But then a whole generation of people who were alive that day, keep waiting and hoping and RFK Jr. must be amongst them.  We're not sure what they think, they'll find.  Maybe there's a typed up confession.  'I shot JFK from the grassy knoll.'  Signed Wouldn't you like to know?  But we doubt it. 

And, as time passes and the people who were alive that day shuffle off to the hereafter, the never ending curiosity of what happened on that day, will die off with them.  A whole host conspiracy theories will disappear from books, movies, documentaries and even The Screen-O-Sphere.  When the last secret file  is released and there is nothing there and the who done it, was it Oswald acting alone? was it The CIA? The FBI?  LBJ? Nixon? The Whitehouse Plumbers? The Mafia, The Chicago Outfit? becomes an unanswered question just dangling in the air, the world will go on.  Just as it has for the last 60 years.  

And, don't feel bad for the poor souls who wondered and heaped conspiracy theory on top of conspiracy theory on top of conspiracy theory and never got an answer.  Because once they all reach that "undiscovered country from which no traveler returns" they can just ask.  And, they won't need any stinking documents.

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It's Good To Be The King

There was that moment and you can see it in the picture above when William kissed his Father the newly crowned King Charles III and a tear rolled down the King's cheek.  You knew then, that it is good to be The King.

Not so good was poor Harry, strolling into the Coronation all by himself with no wife and not even his children by his side.  Children, who could easily be there, as they are also the grandchildren of King Charles III.  In that moment Harry knew that barring some unforeseen, unimaginable catastrophe, he would never be The King.  Harry knew it before.  He even titled his book accordingly but still it had to have hit home with a sort of finality, that all he'd ever be was The Spare.

Sitting home in her palatial mansion in California gnashing her teeth, was the woman who had forsaken the Royalty but still uses the title Duchess, realizing that she blew it because...  It is good to be The King.  And now, she'll never, ever, even, get close.

Then there was that moment after Elon Musk had fired, let go or watched those who resigned, leave Twitter and the number inched over 6500 ex-employees.  Elon only has a 1,000 employees left and yet, the thing runs better than before, saving him millions a year.  And, Elon knew right then that...  It's good to be The King.

 And Tucker Carlson unceremoniously dumped by Fox News for reasons unknown has received offers from Rumble a Podcast forum and Newsmax a competing conservative news channel.  In fact, Newsmax has offered Tucker more money than Fox News!  But Tucker is holding his cards tight to his vest.  Tucker realizes he is the biggest name in news talk right now.  And, as ratings for Fox News have cratered since they dumped him, Tucker knows he's bigger than Fox News.  He doesn't need Newsmax or the money.  It's not about the money.  It's about who's in charge and who gets to call the shots.  So Tucker has met with Elon Musk.   Because Tucker knows that Elon knows that...  It's good to be The King.

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The Maltese Falcon

The Maltese Falcon is a Private Eye novel by Dashiell Hammett that was turned into one of the great film noirs, starring Humphrey Bogart, Mary Astor, Sydney Greenstreet and Peter Lorre.  It is a story of a quest for a priceless treasure "the stuff that dreams are made of".  A story of lust, love, greed and murder.  The hero of this narrative Sam Spade/Humphrey Bogart outwits the bad guys, solves the case  but succumbs to the wily, seductive charms of the femme fatal Mary Astor/Brigid O'Shaughnessy.  Also somewhere along the way, he realizes Brigid O'Shaughnessy is the one, who killed his partner.  In one of the classic scenes of all time, he explains to her.  "You killed Miles (his partner) and you're going over for it."  ... "I won't play the sap for you!"  "I won't walk in the shoes of Thursby (her previous paramour) and I don't know how many others footsteps..."

This is a movie Tucker Carlson pictured above should have watched and if he did, he should have paid more attention to the ending.  Because he just walked in the footsteps of...  and it's a big long list of people, too numerous to even mention mention here.  People who exited the TV news business with the door banging them in the ass, if they didn't move quickly enough.  Of course the ex TV news stars made millions while all Bogart/Sam Spade got was a broken heart.  Of course the ex TV news stars have the broken heart too.  They lost the promise of the priceless treasure, "the stuff that dreams are made of".  That stuff, was being on TV every night.  Getting to put their two cents in on everything.  Getting to prop up and tear down anyone and anything.  Getting to interview Presidents, Princes, Kings and Queens with their own name, on everyone's lips.  

But all of a sudden it was over.  If they moved quickly enough and the door didn't bang their ass, they were off to some obscure cable TV show that hardly anyone watches.  Or their own Podcast that might make more money and even have a larger audience but their name, was no longer on everyone's lips.  The Presidents, the Princes, the Kings and the Queens did not stop by.  And with their name no longer on everyone's lips, that name began to fade away, like one of the notes in the bugle call Taps, played at the end of a soldier's day or his funeral... Chris Cuomo, Bill O'Reilly, Dan Rather...  Da da dah.

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Working?

For years it was Live with Kelly and Ryan in the morning on ABC.  Before that it was Kelly and Regis and before that it was Regis and...  We'll stop here as this is starting to sound like the Bible but the show has always been a man and a woman drinking coffee and bantering about just anything or nothing.  The concept was always a married couple having their morning coffee.  Of course most of the time the couple on Live With... weren't actually married and everyone knew it was all just make believe.  A real married couple wouldn't banter all cute all the time and certainly not in the morning.

But then someone at ABC got a bright idea why not bring in Kelly's real live husband Mark?  He's actually better looking than Ryan and since the concept is a married couple bantering, why this would be great!  But whoever thought this up didn't realize it was the fantasy that made the show.  First off whether it was Regis or Ryan or some other host filling in as the man, they invariably would listen to Kelly.  Everyone knows that men hardly listen to their real wives, especially in the morning.  So, the audience liked the fake husband, who was listening.  Now that they have the real husband who has to act like he's listening, well, it's too fake.  So, it's just not working out.

And all charges have been dropped against Alec Baldwin.  Those were two counts of involuntary manslaughter.  In case you forgot or never knew, Alec Baldwin shot two of his employees while making the western movie, 'Rust'.  Alec was practicing his quick draw in front of the camera, when his gun went off.  He wounded one person and sadly, killed another.  There was a lengthy investigation and then the charges were brought against Alec.  But now it seems the Prosecution has come around to believing Alec, when he said he never pulled the trigger.  This, in spite of the F.B.I. testing that gun and saying it was not possible for the gun, to fire without someone pulling the trigger.  Guess no one believes the F.B.I., anymore.  But with all charges dropped, Alec is headed back to the set of  'Rust' out in New Mexico, where they can start shooting again.  Guess things are working out for Alec.

And, Huma Abedin was seen having dinner with her estranged or just strange ex-husband Anthony Weiner.  Not so long ago, Huma and Anthony were a power couple on the rise, as she was an aide and also a  close friend/confidante of HerHillaryness.  And, he of course a Congressmen and close friend/confidante of Chuckie Schumer.  But then Anthony literally, couldn't keep his thing in his pants and got not only wished off to the cornfields but also sent to the Hoosegow.  Huma got the divorce and seemed to have bounced back in the last few years.  Thanks to a lot of jobs and money from HerHillaryness's friends.  And, she was even dating Academy Award winning actor, Bradley Cooper!  But then, there she was just the other night, out to dinner with Anthony.  We're guessing things with Brad just didn't work out.

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Questions

We're not sure if the war on terror is over, as no one has made any such announcement.  But it does seem that the Mass Hysteria and the Government, if we can differentiate between the two, have not mentioned the war on terror or the terrorists too much in the last few years.  Guys with bombs in their or shoes or underwear are starting to become quaint, old memories.  It seems the only place you can find operational terrorists is on our TV shows.  In fact, it seems that over the last twenty two years since 9/11, there have been more terrorists on our TV shows, than there were in real life.  Which kind of leaves us wondering, why is that?

And, with crime soaring in New York City, Mayor Adams is unveiling these guys right here.

We call it R2D2 to the rescue.  And, these Bots have all kinds of abilities.  Like they can detect people in remote areas which sounds like the Grand Canyon or an empty warehouse.  So this is a great idea since they'll be deployed in Times Square, where as the saying goes about crowded places. "It's like Times Square in there".  And the Bots will be on the Subway another place where it's.  "Like Times Square in there."  The Bots can also read license plates.  And again, this is great idea for Times Square where traffic inches forward at about two miles an hour and a  senile, old man with cataracts could do the same thing.  And, we're kind of wondering what kind of graffiti the Bots will get tagged with?  And, will people pet the Digi-dog Bot?  And last but not least.  Do we feel safe now?

And then there is the Who's Who at King Charles III Coronation.  Prince William and Kate and all their kids will attend, of course.  Then there is the Prince and Princess of Monaco, of course.  And, the Prince and Princess of Japan.  Bet you didn't even know they had them.  Then ending all the speculation Harry is coming but no Meghan or their kids.  Wasn't hard to see that one coming.  But not coming is Elton John, whoa.  Why would he?  Possible attendees include David and Victoria Beckam.  Like what did they ever do?  And, ditto on that with TV actress Sandra Oh.  Hunh?  And, no one here got an invite.  Ah, who'd a' thunk it?  

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