Government For Dummies

There used to be books about Personal Computers or Coding and all manner of things.  Things that were new or things that were old.  But things we had to learn how to do.  These books would be called 'Computers for Dummies' or 'Coding for Dummies' or even 'Sex for Dummies'.  Like we said things that people had to know how to do and might not know how to do.  But these books would put you on the right path.  Unfortunately for some, they don't put those books out anymore.  Quel dommage.

Well it seems that we need another of these books and it's 'Government for Dummies'.  It seems that Four Star Admiral Robert Burke, pictured above and second in command of the United States Navy, got caught in a quid pro quo.  He agreed to steer a contract towards a certain unnamed company in return for a job after he retired from the Navy.  If there was a book 'Government for Dummies', it would have explained to Four Star Admiral Burke, that you steer the contract to the company.  Then you retire.  You then wait the 18 months that is usually a requirement of high government officials who procure contracts with private companies and then you send in your resume.  The only kind of person who would do it the way Four Star Admiral Burke did it, is...  you guessed it fans...  a Dummy!

And next up is New York City Councilman Harold 'Hesy' Tischler who got recorded offering to buy a New York Fire Department Inspector a Pastrami and a Corn Beef sandwich, complete with pickles, coleslaw and a coke.  This all happened when two neighbors in the Councilman's district got into a dispute over a Propane Gas tank that one of the neighbors had in his yard.  And, we're sure the Councilman will say he didn't literally mean to buy the Inspector a sandwich, just that he was trying to resolve the dispute and it was his way of saying.  "Let's end this and we can all break bread together."  But since this is New York City, he used the words "Pastrami" and "Corned Beef with pickles, coleslaw and a coke" instead of bread.

We're pretty sure nothing will happen to the Councilman other than he'll get re-elected next time he runs.  But the 'Government for Dummies' book would explain that it's the 21st Century, so the Councilman should have assumed that everything is recorded and not gotten into this mess.  The book 'Government for Dummies' would also explain to the FDNY Inspector, that anytime, anyone says anything, remotely like this to him, he should yell.  "I'm a New York City Employee!  I work for the People of the City of New York!  I don't want no stinkin' sandwich!"  Or any other sinkin' thing, he may get offered.

Consider this article, a Public Service Announcement.  And Books for Dummies people, get crackin'.

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